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Healthy Boundaries for Online Safety

Selina Horrocks
Nov 25, 2017
2 min read

Do you find yourself checking Facebook when you’re at the park with your kids, or emailing from your phone during dinner? As adults, many of us struggle to set healthy boundaries for our own use of technology, but our children need those healthy boundaries even more than we do, and it’s up to us as their parents to set the rules.

There are some simple things you can implement in your family that will help keep your kids safe when they are online.

Keep computers and devices in a communal space in your home and out of your children’s bedrooms. Children are much less likely to get themselves into difficult situations they don’t know how to handle if they’re not behind closed doors.
Have a central charging location where all devices (yes, including yours!) go when you get home from school, before dinner time, or at the end of the day . This allows real down-time from messages and chats.
Set healthy limits about how much time is spent online each day, and for what purpose. Don’t let your fears or potential problems stop you from letting your child use technology for their education and personal interests.
Talk with your kids about staying safe online. It is important they understand that not everyone is who they say they are on the internet. YAPPY is a useful acronym when it comes to information they shouldn't share online:

Your full name

Addresses

Phone numbers

Passwords

Your plans

Don’t support your child in signing up for accounts that are 13+ if they are underage (Facebook, Instagram, YouTube etc). Once they are old enough to have an account, and you are comfortable with them having one, help them with their privacy settings to limit access only to people they know well.
Engage with what your children are doing when they are online. Talk to them about the websites they visit, sit with them and get them to show you the games they play. Showing interest in their online experiences makes them more likely to talk to you if something goes wrong.
Access to technology and the internet should be a privilege, not a right, and your children should learn how to use their devices responsibly. Write an agreement with them about acceptable use and consequences for breaking the agreement. Nothing they do online should be kept from you. Have a list of their usernames and passwords and do random checks on their accounts and browsing history. Randomly check the images and videos on their phones as well.

It's important that you model these behaviours and stick to these boundaries yourself. You need to "walk the talk" instead of “do as I say, not as I do” and set the example for your kids.

The NSPCC in the UK sums things up in this nifty graphic: